The Devil's Match - Funny drunk, bar & alcohol jokes

THE DEVIL'S MATCH

The Devil walks into a crowded bar. Within seconds the bar emptied with people running out screaming all over the place, all except for one old man leaned over the bar.

The Devil wanders across to the old man and says "Do you know how I am?"

The old man took another sip of his beer and answered "Yep"

The Devil stared at the old man and asked "Well aren't you afraid of me?"

The old boy looks the Devil up and down for a minute and shrugs "I married your sister 40 years ago, why the hell should I be scared of you?"

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Teddy catches thief red-handed

A forensic science graduate caught a care assistant thieving from her sick grandmother - with the help of a camera hidden inside a teddy bear.

Emma Sampson, 21, set out to nab the thief after her grandmother, 75-year-old Thelma Sampson, noticed that money was missing from her home in Walton, Liverpool, England.

The forensic science graduate cleverly put her science skills to work and called in the help of teddy and a hidden camera.

Emma and her dad Robert devised the scheme after his mom Thelma, who has end stage leukemia, noticed £40 had gone missing from her purse.

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