A
guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink
and while he's drinking, the monkey jumps all around the
place.
The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them.
Then grabs some sliced limes and eats them. Then jumps onto
the pool table, grabs one of the billiard balls, sticks
it in his mouth, and to everyone's amazement, somehow swallows
it whole.
The bartender screams at the guy "Did you see what
your monkey just did?"
The guy says "No, what?" "He just ate the
cue ball off my pool table-whole!"
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me,"replied the
guy. "He eats everything in sight, the little bastard.
Sorry. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finishes
his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the monkey
ate, then leaves.
Two weeks later he's in the bar again, and has his monkey
with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running
around the bar again. While the man is finishing his drink,
the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs
it, sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it. The
bartender is disgusted.
"Did you see what your monkey did now?" he asks.
"No, what?" replies the guy. "Well, he stuck
a maraschino cherry up his butt, pulled it out, and ate
it!" said the bartender.
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the
guy. " He still eats everything in sight, but ever
since he swallowed that cue ball, he measures everything
first..."
