A
young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and stops to entertain
at a bar in a small town.
He's going through his usual run of silly blonde jokes when
a big blonde woman in the fourth row stands on her chair
and says, "OK jerk, I've heard just about enough of
your denigrating blonde jokes. What makes you think you
can stereotype women that way? What do a person's physical
attributes have to do with their worth as a human being?
It's guys like you who keep women like me from being respected
at work and in my community, of reaching my full potential
as a person...because you and your kind continue to perpetuate
discrimination against not only blondes but women at large...
all in the name of humor."
Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to apologize, when the
blonde pipes up, "You stay out of this mister, I'm
talking to that little f*cker on your knee!"
I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.
It's not true that married men live longer than single men. It
only seems longer.
Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible.
A man was complaining to a friend: 'I had it all - money, a beautiful
house,a big car, the love of a beautiful woman; then, Pow! it was
all gone!' 'What happened?' asked the friend. 'My wife found out...'
Wife: Let's go out and have some fun tonight. Husband: Okay, but if you
get home before I do, leave the hallway light on.
How many men does it take to open a beer? None. It should be opened by
the time she brings it to the couch.