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BANK
ROBBERY
Excerpted
from an article about a bank robbery which appeared in the
Irish Times on 2 March 1999:
Once inside the bank shortly after midnight, a gang of raiders'
efforts at disabling the internal security system got underway
immediately. The robbers, who expected to find one or two
large safes filled with cash and valuables, were surprised
to see hundreds of smaller safes scattered throughout the
bank.
The robbers cracked the first safe's combination, and inside
they found only a bowl of vanilla pudding. As recorded on
the bank's audio-tape system, one said, "At least we'll
get a bit to eat," The robbers opened up a second safe,
and it also contained nothing but vanilla pudding.
The process continued until all the safes were opened. They
found not one pound sterling, a diamond, or an ounce of
gold. Instead, all the safes contained covered bowls of
pudding.
Disappointed, the robbers made a quiet exit, each leaving
with nothing more than a queasy, uncomfortably full stomach.
The newspaper headline read: IRELAND'S LARGEST SPERM BANK
ROBBED EARLY THIS MORNING.
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