GOD CREATED THE EMERALD ISLE
upon a time in the kingdom of Heaven, God went missing for
Eventually, Michael the archangel found him. He inquired
of God, "where were you?".
God sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed
downwards through the clouds; "look son, look what
I'm after making". Archangel Michael looked puzzled
and said, "what is it?"
God replied, "it's another planet but I'm after putting
LIFE on it. I've named it Earth and there's going to be
a balance between everything on it. For example, there's
North America and South America. North America is going
to be rich and South America is going to be poor, and the
narrow bit joining them - that's going to be a hot spot.
Now look over here. I've put a continent of whites in the
north and another one of blacks in the south."
And then the archangel said, "and what's that green
dot there?". And God said "ahhh that's the Emerald
Isle - that's a very special place. That's going to be the
most glorious spot on earth: beautiful mountains, lakes,
rivers, streams, and an exquisite coast line."
"These people here are going to be great craic and
they're going to be found traveling the world. They'll be
playwrights and poets and singers and songwriters. And I'm
going to give them this black liquid which they're going
to go mad on and for which people will come from the far
corners of the earth to imbibe."
Michael the Archangel gasped in wonder and admiration but
then seeming startled proclaimed: "Hold on a second,
what about the BALANCE, you said there was going to be a
God replied wisely. "Wait until you see the neighbours
I'm going to give them"