IRISH COLLEGE ONE-LINERS

Q. Why don't they have Christmas at Trinity?
A. They can't find a virgin and three wise men.
Q. How do they separate the men from the boys at Trinity?
A. With a restraining order.

A severe storm rumbled through Carlow last week and destroyed
the entire town: $10 worth of damage was reported.

Q. What do you get when you drive quickly through the Carlow campus?
A. An undergraduate degree.
Q. What's the first thing a Trinity girl does when she wakes up in the morning?
A. Walks home.
Q. How can you tell if a Trinity student is heterosexual?
A. He can outrun his roommate!
Q. What does a IT student call a D.C.U student after graduation?
A. Boss.
Q. Why do they sell so many button-fly jeans in Carlow?
A. Because the sheep can hear the zippers a mile away.
Q. Did you hear that the library at Trinity burned down?
A. Naturally, the students were very upset....some of the books weren't colored-in yet.
Q. Why do Trinity graduates put a copy of their diploma in the window of their vehicles?
A. So they can park in handicap spaces.
Q. How do you get a IT grad off your front porch?
A. Pay him for the pizza.
Q. What do tornadoes and graduates from IT's have in common?
A. They both end up in trailer parks.

STUDENTS CHANGE LIGHTBULB

How many Athlone IT students does it take to change a
lightbulb?
None - Westmeath looks better in the dark.

How many Trinity students does it take to change a lightbulb?
One - he holds the bulb and the world revolves around him

How many UL students does it take to change a lightbulb?
Three - One to change it and two to figure out how to get high
off the old one.