Lifeisajoke funny jokes, pictures, cartoons, flash greetings, movies, cartoons, quotes
Latest Funny Pictures, Cartoons, Flash Animations
Boobs can get you killed
Boobs Can Kill
Desperate Housewives
Desperate Wives
Recycles testicle uses
Old Testicles
Doggy Dating Flash Movie
Doggy Dating
Ozzy Osbourne Flash Movie
Ozzy Cookbook


 Friends
Jokes Gallery
SuperLaugh Ecards
Guzer Funny Videos
All Funny Pictures
Cartoons4Fun
GoofyHumor
CrazyLaughs
Funny
Twisted Animations
Aha! Jokes
Funny Pics
Personal Horoscope

 More Friends



GUIDE TO STAYING STRESSED

Are you worried now about how to stay stressed? You'll have no trouble if you practice the following clinically proven methods:

NEVER EXERCISE. Exercise wastes a lot of time that could be spent worrying.

EAT ANYTHING YOU WANT. Hey, if cigarette smoke can't cleanse your system, a balanced diet isn't likely to.

GAIN WEIGHT. Work hard at staying at least 25 pounds over your recommended weight.

TAKE PLENTY OF STIMULANTS. The old standards of caffeine, nicotine, sugar, and cola will continue to do the job just fine.

AVOID "WOO-WOO" PRACTICES. Ignore the evidence suggesting that meditation, yoga, deep breathing, and/or mental imaging help to reduce stress. Be a man! That goes for women too.

GET RID OF YOUR SOCIAL SUPPORT SYSTEM. Let the few friends who are willing to tolerate you know that you concern yourself with friendships only if you have time, and you never have time. If a few people persist in trying to be your friend, avoid them.

PERSONALIZE ALL CRITICISM. Anyone who criticizes any aspect of your work, family, dog, house, or car is mounting a personal attack. Don't take time to listen, be offended, then return the attack!

MALES AND FEMALES ALIKE - BE MACHO. Never ever ask for help, and if you want it done right, do it yourself!

BECOME A WORKAHOLIC. Put work before everything else, and be sure to take work home evenings and weekends. Keep reminding yourself that vacations are for sissies.

DISCARD GOOD TIME MANAGEMENT SKILLS. Schedule in more activities every day than you can possibly get done and then worry about it all whenever you get a chance.

PROCRASTINATE. Putting things off to the last second always produces a marvelous amount of stress.

WORRY ABOUT THINGS YOU CAN'T CONTROL. Worry about the stock market, earthquakes, the approaching Ice Age, you know, all the big issues.

THROW OUT YOUR SENSE OF HUMOR. Staying stressed is no laughing matter, and it shouldn't be treated as one.

< - Previous Joke | Next Joke - >

Back to Index


Guaranteed to Amaze and Amuse You
Proceed
Proceed...
I'm Poopin
I'm Poopin
Police at Work
Police at Work
One Word to Say 2 U
One Word to Say 2 U
Don't Take My Teddy
Don't Take My Teddy

Funny Quote of the Day

Bookmark and Share

Privacy Statement | © Copyright 2003/2009