might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake whole relationships."
"My girlfriend always laughs during sex---no matter
what she's reading." Steve Jobs (Founder: Apple Computers)
"I saw a woman wearing a sweatshirt with "Guess"
on it. I said, "Thyroid
problem?" Arnold Schwarzenegger
"Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a
sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed
like black pimps." Tiger Woods
"Capital punishment turns the state into a murderer.
turns the state into a gay dungeon-master." Rev. Jesse
"My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch."
"Clinton lied. A man might forget where he parks or
where he lives, but he never forgets oral sex, no matter
how bad it is." Barbara Bush (Former US First Lady)
"Ah, yes, divorce, from the Latin word meaning to
rip out a man's genitals through his wallet" Robin
"Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I
think of it as the only time of the month that I can be
"Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a
place." Billy Crystal
"According to a new survey, women say they feel more
comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing
in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental,
where, of course, men are just grateful." Robert De
"There's a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting
that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms.
They say they cause severe swelling. So what's the problem?"
"There's very little advice in men's magazines, because
men think, I know what I'm doing. Just show me somebody
naked." Jerry Seinfield
"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find
a woman I don't like and just give her a house." Rod
"See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and
a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time."