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101 Ways to Annoy People

1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."

3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."

5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

Read all 101 Ways to Annoy People

OSAMA SHORT JOKES

Q. What's the difference between Elvis and Osama Bin Laden?
A. Osama is a dead man!

Q. What do Monica Lewinsky and Osama Bin Laden have in common?
A. They both blew a power structure!!

To catch Osama Bin Laden, Grandpa sez:
Spray Afghanistan with Viagra and the little prick will pop up!

Q. Why does Osama Bin Laden collect goat shit?
A. Because it's a great growing culture for anthrax, and it makes terrific deodorant.

Q. Why did Osama fire Martha Stewart?
A. She was unable to find fabric that went with stalagmites.

Q. What do you call a Taliban with a goat and a sheep?
A. Bisexual.

Q. Why did the Taliban school alternate Sex Education classes with Drivers Ed.?
A. They only had one camel.

Q. What's another name for the DaisyCutter bomb?
A. The TaliWhacker.

Q. Why do the Taliban wear robes?
A. A goat can hear a zipper a mile away.

Q. Know what the Taliban do for fun?
A. Sit around and get bombed

Osama Bin Laden never sleeps in the same place two nights in a row, just like Bill Clinton.

Q. What's the national bird of Afghanistan?
A. Duck!!

Q. Why do they call the camel Q. "the ship of the desert?"
A. Because it's full of Arab semen!

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