TALIBAN TV GUIDE
8.30 Talitubbies. Talitubbies
say "Ah-ah". Dipsy and Tinky-Winky repair a Stinger
9.00 Shouts of Praise.
11.00 Jihad's Army.
The Kandahar-on-Sea battalion repulse another attack by
evil, imperialist, Zionist backed infidels.
12.00 Ready, Steady, Jihad!
Celebrities make lethal devices out of everyday objects.
12.30 Panoramadan. The
programme reports on Americas attempts to take over the
13.30 Xena: Modestly dressed Housewife.
Xena stays at home and does some cooking.
14.00 Only Fools and Camels.
Dhal-Boy offloads some Chinese rocket launchers to Hamas.
14.30 Green Peter. The
total of Kalashnikovs bought by the milk bottle top appeal
15.00 Madrasah Challenge.
Two more Islamic colleges meet. Bambah Kaskhain asks the
questions.'Starter for ten, no praying.'
15.30 I Love 629. A
look back at the events of the year, including the Prophet's
entry into Mecca, and the destruction of pagan idols.
16.00 Question Time.
Members of the public face questions from political and
17.00 Koranation Street.
Deirdrie faces execution by stoning for adultery.
17.30 Middle-East Enders.
The entire cast is jailed for unislamic behaviour.
18.00 Holiday. The team
go on pilgrimage to Mecca. Again.
18.30 Top of the Prophets.
Will the Koran be No.1 for the 63,728th week running?
19.00 Who wants to be a Mujahadin?
Mahmoud Tarran asks the questions.
Will contestants phone a mullah, go 'inshallah', or ask
the Islamic council?
20.00 FILM: Shariah's Angels.
The three burkha-clad sleuths go undercover to expose an
evil scheme to educate women.
21.30 Big Brother. Who
will be taken out of the house and executed this week?
22.30 Shahs in their Eyes.
More hopefuls imitate famous destroyers of the infidel.
23.30 They think it's Allah over.
Quiz culminating in the 'don't feel it the Mullah' round.
0.00 When Imams attack.
Amusing footage shot secretly in mosques. The filmers were
also secretly shot.
00.30 a.m. The West Bank Show.
Arts programme looking at anti-Israel graffiti art in the
01.30 Bhuffi the Infidel Slayer.
02.00 A book at bedtime.
The Koran. Again.