SEPT 11 - SPEECH BUSH SHOULD HAVE GIVEN
evening my fellow Americans.
First, I want to pass on my condolences to the people of
New York and all Americans that are hurting in this tragic
time. You can rest assured that anything and everything
that can be done to assure the safety of our country will
be done. This is the greatest country in the world and we
will get through this trying time. Now is the time for all
people to set aside our petty differences and show the world
that no one or nothing can destroy the fortitude of the
To the people responsible for Tuesday's tragedy, I say this:
Are you fucking kidding me? Are the turbans on your heads
wrapped too tight? Have you gone too long without a bath?
Do you not know who you are fucking with? Americans are
so hungry to kill, that we shoot at each other every day.
We will relish that opportunity for new targets for our
Have you forgotten history? What happened to the last people
that started fucking around with us? Remember the little
yellow bastards over in Japan? We slapped them all over
the Pacific and roasted about 2 million of them in their
own back yard. That's what we in America call a big ass
Ever seen Texas on a map? Ever wonder why it's so big? Because
we wanted it that way when Mexico started jacking around
with the Alamo. What are they doing now? They cut our lawns.
Oh yeah remember England? We sent them packing.
Ask your buddy Saddam about fucking with the good 'ole USA.
The only reason he got away the first time is because it's
too hard to shoot someone when you're doubled over laughing
at them. Our soldiers aren't trained to laugh and shoot
at the same time. Now he couldn't stop a pack of cub scouts
from taking over his shitty little country.
Trust us, Afghanistan will end up a giant kitty litter box.
Go ahead and try to hide, Bin Laden. There's not a hole
deep enough or a mountain high enough that's going to keep
your camel-riding-ass safe. We will bomb every inch of the
country that harbors him, his camps and any place that looks
and even smells like he was there. Hell, we might even drop
a few bombs on people that have pissed us off in the past.
This is America. We kick ass. This is what we do. Go ahead
and laugh now, but the Tomahawks are coming and we will
smoke your sorry asses.
God bless America!