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Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some hire
public relations officers. (Daniel J. Boorstin)
There's
no such thing as bad publicity except your own obituary.
(Brendan Behan)
I
don't care what you say about me, as long as you say something
about me, and as long as you spell my name right. (George
M. Cohan)
In
the future everybody will be world famous for fifteen minutes.
(Andy Warhol)
Small
earthquake in Chile. Not many dead. (Claud Cockburn, winning
entry for a dullest headline competition at the Times)
Medicine
and Health
Exercise is bunk. If you are healthy, you don't need it:
if you are sick you should not take it. (Henry Ford)
I
have the body of an eighteen year old. I keep it in the
fridge. (Spike Milligan)
Either
this man is dead or my watch is stopped. (Groucho Marx)
I'm
not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring
the nearest golf course. (Groucho Marx)
Is
there anything worn under the kilt? No, it's all in perfect
working order. (Spike Milligan)
Be
careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.
(Mark Twain)
Politics
and War
He
knows nothing; and he thinks he knows everything. That points
clearly to a political career. (George Bernard Shaw)
The
golden rule is that there are no golden rules. (George Bernard
Shaw)
Speak
softly and carry a big stick; you will go far. (Theodore
Roosevelt)
Power
is the great aphrodisiac. (Henry Kissinger)
Politics
is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians. (Charles
de Gaulle)
Big
Brother is watching you. (George Orwell)
War
is peace. Freedom is slavery. Ignorance is strength. (George
Orwell)
What's
wrong with being a boring kind of guy? (George Bush)
Hell,
I never vote for anybody. I always vote against. (W.C. Fields)
The
ideal form of government is democracy tempered with assassination.
(Voltaire)
When
the President does it, that means that it is not illegal.
(Richard Nixon)
Suppose
you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of congress.
But I repeat myself. (Mark Twain)
You
won't have Nixon to kick around any more because, gentlemen,
this is my last press conference. (Richard Nixon, after
losing election for Governor of California)
There
can be no whitewash at the White House. (Richard Nixon,
on Watergate)
All
animals are equal but some are more equal than others. (George
Orwell)
A
week is a long time in politics. (Harold Wilson)
If
you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen. (Harry
S. Truman)
The
buck stops here (Harry S. Truman)
Political
language…is designed to make lies sound truthful and
murder respectable, and to give an appearance of solidity
to pure wind. (George Orwell)
Politics
is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come
to realise that it bears a very close resemblance to the
first. (Ronald Reagan)
My
fellow Americans, I am pleased to tell you I just signed
legislation which outlaws Russia forever. The bombing will
begin in five minutes. (Ronald Reagan, during radio microphone
test)
I
don't know what effect these men will have upon the enemy,
but, by God, they terrify me. (Duke of Wellington)
Another
such victory and we are undone. (Pyrrhus)
If
you've got them by the balls, their hearts and minds will
follow. (John Wayne)
Better
to have him inside the tent pissing out, than outside pissing
in. (Lynden B. Johnson, of J. Edgar Hoover)
I
want his pecker in my pocket. (Lyndon B. Johnson, discussing
prospective assistant)
The
war has developed not necessarily to Japan's advantage.
(Emperor Hirohito, announcing Japan's surrender after atom
bombs destroyed Hiroshima and Nagasaki)
Like
being savaged by a dead sheep. (Denis Healey, when criticised
by Geoffrey Howe in House of Commons)
First
law on holes - when you're in one, stop digging! (Denis
Healey)
Politics
are too serious a matter to be left to the politicians.
(Charles de Gaulle)
To
jaw-jaw is always better than to war-war. (Winston Churchill)
We
know what happens to people who stay in the middle of the
road. They get run down. (Aneurin Bevan)
George
Washington, as a boy, was ignorant of the commonest accomplishments
of youth. He could not even lie. (Mark Twain)
All
people are born alike -- except Republicans and Democrats.
(Groucho Marx)
It's
a funny old world. (Margaret Thatcher)
Funny
quotes Pages
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