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101 Ways to Annoy People

1. Sing the Batman theme incessantly.

2. In the memo field of all your checks, write "for sensual massage."

3. Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

4. Learn Morse code, and have conversations with friends in public consisting entirely of "Beeeep Bip Bip Beeep Bip..."

5. If you have a glass eye, tap on it occasionally with your pen while talking to others.

Read all 101 Ways to Annoy People

TOP REASONS TO BE AN ECONOMIST

  1. It's a great way to pick up girls, because they'll think you HAVE money.

  2. It's as interesting or more so than being a political scientist.

  3. It's a hell of a lot more fun than the "Where's Waldo" club. You get to find the missing money in the deficit budget picture!!!

  4. Good pay for sitting around in dressy clothes and discuss what other people should do about problems we all face.

  5. Business people will respect you and thus give you great deals on all the best drugs.

  6. It's the best way to stay out of politics. If you know what you're doing, then you're totally unqualified for office.

  7. The feeling of superiority. Nothing beats talking down to a bunch of people who haven't got a clue and are willing to go along with whatever you say because they assume you know what you're talking about.

  8. It's a good way to assure dinner reservations.

  9. Early retirement. Hell, the career and the retirement will all seem the same.

  10. You sweat a lot less than accountants do.

  11. You can tell the girls: Trust me, I am an economist.

  12. You can claim a *reason* for using a portable computer on the bus.

  13. Nobody will ever ask you for a few dollars over the weekend.

  14. You can read the financial pages while drinking daiquiris in the bar.

  15. The ability to coldly stare muscled bullies into the eyes and snarl: - According to Smith's theorem, you are WRONG.

  16. You can tell people exactly what the right thing to buy is -- and afterwards, you can tell them exactly why it didn't work.

  17. You can get a job at any McDonald's.

  18. Wearing pin-striped suits in public.

  19. Getting to join the 'Wall Street' fan club.

  20. Never be expected to actually *create* anything.

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